solipschtick

absoluticris:

in the super bowl party im hosting, we are starting this drinking game at kickoff and will adjust drinking to prevent drinking deaths at the minimum.

NEW ORLEANS SAINTS SUPERBOWL DRINKING GAME:

1. Every time they mention hurricane Katrina, drink 1

2. If they show pictures of the City of New Orleans right after Katrina, drink 1

3. Every time they say how much the Saints mean to the City of New Orleans, drink 1

4. Every time the words “tragedy”, “flood”, or “devastation” are used, drink 1

5. Every time they talk about how good Reggie Bush was in college, drink 3

6. If they show Kim Kardashian in the stands, drink 5

7. Every time they show a picture of Reggie Bush with a bat or say “bringing the wood” drink for 5 seconds..

8.. Every time Reggie Bush gets negative yardage trying to run around in the backfield a bunch and outrun the defense, drink 1 and turn to the person next to you and say “I told you Vince Young should have won the Heisman”

9. Every time Reggie Bush gets up and flexes his arms in that pose he likes to do, drink 1

10. If they mention Tim Tebow for any reason, funnel a beer

11. Every time they say that “it’s destiny for the Saints to win” drink 1

12. If they show footage of Katrina survivors at the Superdome, take a shot of cheap liquor

13. If they call Saints fans the most passionate fans in football, drink 1

14. If they say that the Saints, Saints fans, or the City of New Orleans “deserve” a Super bowl victory, drink 1

15. Every time they say how good of a story the Saints are, drink 1

16. If Jeremy Shockey pretends to be hurt after dropping a pass, drink 2

17. If they mention the Saints beating the Falcons in 2006 in the first game after Katrina in the Superdome, drink 5 and remember that we are still a better football team with better fans.

18. Every time they compare hurricane Katrina to the Haiti earthquake, funnel a beer and yell “BULL****!”

19. Every time they mention Drew Brees as the Mardi Gras king, drink 1.

20.. Every time they show Archie Manning, drink 1, and mention how bad he sucked. If they show old footage of him on the Saints, drink 5. If they mention how tough of a decision it was for him as for whom to cheer for, drink 10.

21. Every time they show a saints fan yelling “Who dat!” Or a sign/shirt saying the same, drink 1.

22. If they show Chris Paul at the game, drink 1 and mention to someone how much better he is than Marvin Williams.

23. If they show former Mayor Ray Nagin, drink 5 and then punch someone in the face

Other Rules not involving the Saints:
1. Every time they show Eli Manning in the press box, drink 1
2. Every time Pierre Garcon is mentioned with Haiti , drink 1
3. If Brett Favre is mentioned for any reason, drink 1

As a drinking game fan, I approve of this message. As a non-sports fan, I still approve of this message although I am Googling all of the names and references.